Rude Awakening


Rude Awakening

  It’s very early on a Tuesday morning after a three-day holiday weekend. My husband and I decided to take advantage of the time off by doing some remodeling, but that’s another story. I’m tentatively gonna call it “Home Improvement: Learn to Love Your House Just the Way It Is”. As it turned out, we settled for just painting. Now “just painting” is really a lot of work as you move furniture and cover floors and use muscles that you haven’t used since the last time you painted, so we’re very proud that the only casualty was a black dog with a white tail. Or so we thought as we left the windows open to air the house out and went to bed.

   Anyway, back to Tuesday morning. I’m in the midst of a great dream. Dreams can be fuzzy when you first wake up, but I’m pretty sure this one had something to do with Hershey Kisses, George Clooney and shoe shopping. (Paint fumes, who knew?!).

   Then I awaken to the sound of dogs barking wildly and the front door slamming shut. “what the...?”.

   Seems there was a stray dog in our yard and because the windows were open, our dogs took offense. That was what the wild barking was about.

   Seems we also left the windows down on our car.  My poor brother (who was living with us at the time), was assuming the stray was gone and goes out to his truck to go to work. Remember, it’s very early so it’s still dark outside. He gets five steps off the front porch when Cujo jumps out of our car and bites him on the leg. That was what the whole door slamming thing was about.

   So my husband gets on the phone to animal control who amazingly isn’t open at that time of day. He then calls the county sheriff who cheerfully tells us that it’s not their jurisdiction nor their problem and to have a nice day. So we end up with one of Pinellas Park’s finest parked in front of our home.

  The officer approaches our car and Cujo growls, hair standing up on the back of his neck. The cop backs up and the thing to remember here is that he’s the one with the gun. Officer Friendly advises all of us to stay in the house. The kids can’t go to school. We can’t go to work. We’re being held hostage.

  Anyway, it all worked out eventually. Because the police were involved, someone at animal control got beeped and probably had a rude awakening of their own. The dog’s owner was found and thought the whole ordeal was funny until the officer mentioned something to my brother about small claims court in her presence and then her tears began to flow.

   The funniest thing about it all was listening to my brother try to call in late to work after a three-day weekend and saying... “You’ll never believe what just happened, but...”!

  So, I guess in the end, the moral of the story is this. Paint fumes give you sweet dreams and even if you’re in the middle of a drought and you desperately want it to rain, you should always put the windows up on your car every night.

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